Frustrating Aspie Day!

See, he can be still for more than 5 minutes.

Today was very frustrating.  My son, Austin, came home from school with yet another detention.  This poor child has undiagnosed Asperger’s Syndrome.  He is not a neuro-typical child.  Yet, he is being treated like one.  When too much is expected from him he acts out and gets frustrated. And, his teachers don’t understand why he is doing this. 

 I am not trying to make excuses for my son.  Nor, am I excusing his behaviors.  I will be the first one to dole out proper discipline and I require that of other authority figures in regards to my son.  However, Austin is not a neuro-typical child.  He has a neurological disorder that requires some accommodations.  Yes, he should be treated as much like a neuro-typical child but, he needs to be given certain accommodations as discretely as possible.

Here is a prime example of what I’m talking about…

Austin had a spelling packet that was due today.  The whole class had a week in which to finish this packet.  With him forgetting to bring it home, not enough time during school, and becoming distracted; he still managed to finish the packet.  Or, so he thought.  When it was time to hand in the packet, a student that sits next to him was kind enough to tell him to check it over to make sure that it was done.  So, that’s exactly what he did.  While going through the packet, he realized that he had missed two questions.  It only makes sense that he would answer those two questions.  However, as he did this, his teacher came around to check on each student and ask if they had their packet done.  When asked, the student must tell the teacher whether their packet is done or not done.

When the teacher got to Austin, he was finishing the two questions that he had overlooked.  And the operative word here is overlooked.  In his mind, he had finished the packet and he was very proud of himself.  Unfortunately, that pride was shot down immediately.  His teacher emailed me later that day and told me that she saw him write two answers but Austin still insisted that he had finished the packet.  In his mind, not a neuro-typical mind, he had finished the packet.  And, on top of that, he had finished it on time.  This was an amazing feat for him.  He believed that he had finished the packet.  But he had merely overlooked two questions.  It wasn’t done on purpose.  It wasn’t done out of spite.  He had simply overlooked two questions.  I explained this to him and told him how proud I am of him.  That made him smile and I got a big hug from him too!  That, in turn, made me smile.

Needless to say, but I’m going to say it anyway, I’m headed to school first thing in the morning and try to work this thing out.  Austin needs an IEP (individualized education plan).  He needs to have sensory breaks.  He needs to be treated like everyone else as much as possible.  But, when it comes to him having to take a sensory break, it needs to be treated as discreetly as possible.  He never asked to be born with this disorder.  He’s dealing with it the best he knows how to and I’m very proud of him!  I’m proud of all my children and I love them unconditionally!

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ADHD son has new rules

My youngest son, Austin, was diagnosed with ADHD when he was six. Considering that he was so young, I wondered if he had been mis-diagnosed. But, he has shown signs of ADHD since birth and it does run in the family. Over the last 5 1/2 years he has shown no signs of growing out of his behaviors. He has been kicked out of three different schools.  He is easily distracted. He can be very hyper at times; so much so that I become exhausted just trying to keep up with him. And, he talks incessantly and loudly.

 

Austin is an intelligent, loving boy. Most people can’t see that side of him because he has ADHD. What they see is a difficult, hyper, annoying boy who can’t stay still. If they would look below the surface, they would see the same wonderfully amazing child that I see. Dealing with a child who has ADD/ADHD is never easy. It can be very frustrating, exhausting, and annoying. On the other hand, it has been one of the most rewarding learning experiences of my life.

 

Yesterday, I took the kids out shopping. It was very frustrating at times. Each child wanted something different and they just couldn’t wait for the other one to pick out their gifts. But, Austin finally picked out a DS Lite. Since his last DS went to technological heaven, he decided that was what he wanted most. I think that he’s been lost without it. At least all those games that we bought for his last DS aren’t wasted money. It’s one of the very few things my ADHD child can concentrate on.

 

His new DS came with a few rules, however. Being that he does have ADHD, he doesn’t think before he acts. I don’t know how many times I found his last DS on the floor, in the couch, in the kitchen, bathroom, etc. That is the reason why his last DS is in technological heaven. I discussed with him the importance of taking care of his things like I’ve done so many times before. He promised me that he would take care of it. So, I decided to make a few disciplinary actions that I would put into effect.

 

The first time that I find his DS where it doesn’t belong, I would take it away from him for two days. The second time would result in double that time. He would then have to wait four long days without his DS. By the third time, I would take it away for a week. Each and every time after that it would be taken away for a week.

 

I think that, considering his inability to think properly before acting, this is quite fair. I will give him reminders if I see him playing his DS. This gives him a better chance at successfully caring for it better. I can’t expect him to automatically care for his things without some kind of help. This afternoon, while watching an “I love Lucy” marathon, Austin sat next to me on the couch. During commercials he would play his Pokémon game on his DS. “So, where are you going to put that when you’re done playing,” I asked him.

 

“In my room on my dresser,” was his reply.

 

“Very good,” I replied.

 

This is an ongoing task with everything that he does. I have to keep on him all the time and redirect him many times a day. Without proper guidance and patience, he will be doomed to failure. I’m going to make sure that doesn’t happen. I think that with little prompts here and there, behavioral training, and a lot of love he can be successful at anything.

 

For more information about ADD/ADHD in children, visit WebMD.

 

Here is a list of signs and symptoms of a child with ADD/ADHD 

 • Are in constant motion.

 

 • Squirm and fidget.

 

• Do not seem to listen.

 

 • Have difficulty playing quietly.

 

 • Often talk excessively.

 

• Interrupt or intrude on others.

 

• Are easily distracted.

 

• Do not finish tasks.

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Fibromyalgia~What is it?

Many people haven’t even heard of fibromyalgia.  Some that have heard of it don’t believe that it truly exists.  I’m biased on that one! I have suffered with fibromyalgia for 26 years.

Just because you can’t see my pain, doesn’t mean that it’s not real.

Yes, I am limited to what I can do most of the time.  It’s not because I’m lazy.  I would rather be out there running with my children, swimming a few laps in the pool,  or writing a long letter to my loved ones without my hands cramping up and my muscles going into a spasm on me.

If you’re not sure what fibromyalgia is, here’s some information for you.

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Fibromyalgia is a chronic condition characterized by widespread pain in your muscles, ligaments and tendons, as well as fatigue and multiple tender points — places on your body where slight pressure causes pain.  It is classified as a syndrome not a disease because it has many overlapping symptoms.  These symptoms can affect all systems in the body.

Fibromyalgia affects about 2% of the population in the United States alone. It usually affects more women than men.  The name fibromyalgia comes from three root words,  “fibro” meaning fibrous tissue (such as tendons and ligaments), “myo” meaning muscles, and “algia” meaning pain.

The following is a list of fibromyalgia symptoms for informational purposes only.  This is not intended as a diagnosis for fibromyalgia.  If you feel that you may have fibromyalgia, please consult with your doctor.

Not all of these symptoms will apply to everyone at the same time.  Sometimes, fibromyalgia pain will rotate to different areas of the body at different times.

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SYMPTOMS:

Widespread Pain

Multiple Chemical Sensitivity Syndromes

Morning Stiffness

Fatigue

“Fibro fog”: Cognitive or Memory Impairment

Dizziness/Vertigo

Sleep Disorders

Urinary and Pelvic Problems

Chronic Headaches

Cold Symptoms

Temperomandibular Joint
Dysfunction Syndrome(TMJ)

Chest Symptoms

Anxiety

Depression

Dysmenorrhea(excruciating pain during menstrual cycle)

Myofascial pain

Muscle twitches

IBS(irritable bowel syndrome)

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Factors that aggravate fibromyalgia:

Overexertion. Many fibromyalgia sufferers report an increase in their pain and fatigue after exercise or other forms of physical activity. Overexertion tends to increase the severity of muscle pain and fatigue.

Stress. Stress plays a big role in aggravating fibromyalgia symptoms. If a fibromyalgia sufferer experiences emotional stress or anxiety, it can bring on muscle pain, headaches, or even cause anxiety attacks. Other  stressors, such as loud noises or bright lights, can trigger these fibromyalgia symptoms.

Weather. Rain or snow, or having to dealing with rapid changes in weather can trigger painful symptoms and worsen headaches, muscle aches, and depression for fibromyalgia sufferers.

For more information, visit MayoClinic.com

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Monday Madness~Flooding in my area

I had been watching the news last night.  Our local station warned my area of a flood watch.  So, needless to say, I was a tad concerned this morning.  I woke up before my alarm went off because it was raining like crazy.  As I stumbled to the kitchen for a cup of coffee, I wondered how high the creek was.  Black Hole Creek winds its way through the little town of Montgomery, PA and empties into the Susquehanna River.

I stepped out my back door with coffee in hand. I was surprised to see some of the trees along the bank of the creek actually in the creek.  The banks of the creek no longer exist.  Well, they do, but they’re under about two feet of rushing, muddy water.  The park benches were pretty much unusable today.  This photo was taken after the rain had stopped.  When it was still raining, the water was all the way up to the bench seat.

This is next to the playground where my children play.

The area highlighted in red is where my kids usually play when they’re not on the playground.  As you can see, half of that is under water.   That’s the excitement for the day here.  I hope that’s all the excitement that I get.  I don’t think that I could handle anymore excitement.

I wish you all a happy Monday!

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The Kids Are Driving Me Crazy!-Free e-book!

I have four children. So, sometimes it gets really crazy around my house. While my 17 year-old is yelling at her younger brothers, her brothers (ages 11 & 12) play fighting and screaming back at her, messes everywhere, I sit and suffer with an excruciating headache and praying for a break.

If you have days like this, be assured that it does get worse. But, then again, it does get better. One of the best remedies for a crazy day in my house is a laughter break. After all, they say that laughter is the best medicine.

My laughter break came to me today in the form of an e-book entitled, The Kids Are Driving Me Crazy! by Lisa Barker. Lisa Barker is known as “The Jelly Mom” from the humorous Jelly Mom column which can be found at:

JellyMom.com

This e-book is an excerpt from her book Just Because Your Kids Drive You Insane… Doesn’t Mean You Are A Bad Parent!. The e-book cover humorous subjects about toddlers, older children ,going out in public with your kids, kids showing you who the boss is, and so much more.

I highly recommend this book to parents, grandparents, and caretakers so they can enjoy their “laughter break.” Get the free e-book and check out the Jelly Mom Column and more of Lisa’s books.

~Get the free e-book here~

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